Sports Editor Mark Baker rounds a turn on Deepest Darkest at the Jackson Hole Bike Park.
Sports Editor Mark Baker rounds a turn on Deepest Darkest at the Jackson Hole Bike Park.
I thought we were supposed to grow wiser as we grew older.
“You’re an idiot,” a friend told me a day after I rode down something called Deepest Darkest.
Sure, he was kidding. I think. And, yes, I’ve ridden a bike before, but the training wheels didn’t come off until I was 7.
Training wheels I could have used last week when I arrived late for a media-day invite at the Jackson Hole Bike Park.
So what if I’ve never mountain biked before? So what if I had a major back surgery in January to relieve compressed lower disks? So what if I need a left-knee replacement because of bone-on-bone osteoarthritis? So what if I’m three months shy of 60?
It’s a bike “park.” How big of a deal could this be?
Well, if you want to ride the trails, particularly Deepest Darkest, Dirty Hairy and True Grit, you sign a release.
That should have been my first clue.
My fellow journalists, having already ridden a “beginner” trail in the morning, were having lunch at the Four Seasons when I arrived. I was instructed to check in at Jackson Hole Sports to get a bike, helmet, etc., but there was some confusion because of my lateness, and, by the time the group was ready to ascend on the Sweetwater Gondola, I was still bike-less.
Our guide for the day, the resort’s Eric Seymour, director of brand communication and content, came and took care of things, and I got my bike, a sweet Norco with the words “Rock Shock” on its front forks. They grabbed a full-face helmet, which looked like an auto-racing helmet to me, and I pulled it on.
Good? Sure. Little tight, but that’s good, right? Right.
We loaded our bikes on the Sweetwater Gondola racks and then rose 1,276 feet.
“Am I going to be OK?” I asked former News&Guide reporter Tom Hallberg, now an associate editor for Backcountry magazine, after we’d hopped off and grabbed our bikes.
“Here’s a tip — this hand is your front brake,” Hallberg said, squeezing the left handle of his bike, “and this is your back brake,” he added, squeezing his right handle. “If you only use your front brake, you might flip end-over-end.”
The group assembled in front of two signs, one that said Deepest Darkest and the other Dirty Hairy. Underneath the Deepest Darkest sign were two smaller signs that read: “Caution: Enter at your own risk,” and “Warning! This track is designed for downhill racing/Full suspension and body armor is highly recommended. Proceed at your own risk!”
Seymour then had Joe Stone, a C-7 incomplete quadriplegic (he broke his neck in a speed gliding crash 12 years ago) sitting in his $20,000 adaptive mountain bike, tell us what we were about to experience on Deepest Darkest, which opened last August.
“I don’t know everybody’s skill level ...” Stone began.
“Zero,” I mumbled as a couple of helmeted-heads turned.
“ ... on bikes, and that kind of thing, so there’s no features that are, like, gonna shock you,” he continued. “There’s a couple of rollers where if you’re going fast enough, you can catch air. But also if you’re going slow and roll everything on it ... there is one spot on the trail that splits, and then joins right back up like 100 yards later. Doesn’t matter. I like the high side goin’ left, but it doesn’t matter which way you go. It’s just a wide, big flowy trail. ... Rip it as fast as you want and catch air or go a little slower and roll everything.”
And then we were off. And going downhill — immediately. I’d gone too slow out of the gate and the riders in front of me, including News&Guide photographer Reed Mattison, an experienced mountain biker, had already disappeared down Deepest Darkest.
Left or straight? I wondered when I came to where Deepest Darkest intersects with Dirty Hairy. Thank god I kept going straight. Dirty Hairy is the only trail in the park rated “expert only,” while Deepest Darkest is rated intermediate.
Suddenly I was going so fast down one part that, despite gripping the back brake with my right hand as hard as I could, I was still flying into a big, 180-degree berm, the dirt and gravel under my bike’s big, fat tires sliding. This would happen again and again, the younger, faster riders behind me right on my tail.
I got air once, maybe twice. I remember the tires slamming down on the ground, muddy water splashing in my face. I remember screaming — at least on the inside.
But somehow every piece of muscle memory my body has from riding bikes as a kid was still there. Balance ... balance ... balance ... your body weight. Do not wipe out.
I think I was more afraid of embarrassment than death.
The group made a couple of stops on the way down.
“This is somewhere between super-fun and super-terrifying,” I told Mattison on the first stop.
“Always an intersection you want to be at,” he joked.
A day later, back in the office, Mattison, who’s 35 years my junior, confessed that he was a bit worried about me.
“I never would have done that,” he said.
It’s just like riding a bike.
Contact Mark Baker at 732-7065 or sports@jhnewsandguide.com.
Your comment has been submitted.
There was a problem reporting this.
Please note: Online comments may also run in our print publications. Keep it clean. Please avoid obscene, vulgar, lewd, racist or sexually-oriented language. Please turn off your CAPS LOCK. No personal attacks. Discuss issues & opinions rather than denigrating someone with an opposing view. No political attacks. Refrain from using negative slang when identifying political parties. Be truthful. Don’t knowingly lie about anyone or anything. Be proactive. Use the “Report” link on each comment to let us know of abusive posts. Share with us. We’d love to hear eyewitness accounts or history behind an article. Use your real name: Anonymous commenting is not allowed. . The News&Guide welcomes comments from our paid subscribers. Tell us what you think. Thanks for engaging in the conversation!
Please log in, or sign up for a new account and purchase a subscription to read or post comments.
Sorry, no promotional deals were found matching that code.
Promotional Rates were found for your code.
Get up-to-the-minute news sent straight to your device.
Sign up to receive local, breaking news alerts as they become available.
Sign up to receive a weekly e-newsletter with a selection of healthcare and wellness news from the Jackson Hole News&Guide.
Sign up to receive a weekly e-newsletter with a selection of private, public and continuing education news from the Jackson Hole News&Guide.
Sign up to receive a monthly e-newsletter with a selection of photography and video from the Jackson Hole News&Guide.
Sign up to receive a weekly e-newsletter with a selection of town and county government news from the Jackson Hole News&Guide.
Sign up to receive a weekly e-newsletter with a selection of arts and entertainment headlines from the Scene section of Jackson Hole News&Guide.
Sign up to receive a weekly e-newsletter with a selection of economic and business news from the Jackson Hole News&Guide.
Sign up to receive a weekly e-newsletter with a selection of environmental news from the Jackson Hole News&Guide.
Sign up to receive a weekly e-newsletter with a spotlight on Jackson Hole's crime, justice and emergency news from the Jackson Hole News&Guide.
Sign up to receive a daily e-newsletter with a selection of local, state and regional news headlines from the Jackson Hole Daily.
Sign up to receive a weekly e-newsletter with a selection of inspiring stories about the faces and places of Jackson Hole from the Jackson Hole News&Guide.
Sign up to receive a weekly e-newsletter with a selection of outdoors, sports and recreation news from the Jackson Hole News&Guide.
Sign up to receive a weekly e-newsletter with a selection of trending local news headlines from the Jackson Hole News&Guide.
Sign up to receive a weekly e-newsletter with a selection of news headlines from the Jackson Hole News&Guide.
Your account has been registered, and you are now logged in.
Check your email for details.
Invalid password or account does not exist
Submitting this form below will send a message to your email with a link to change your password.
An email message containing instructions on how to reset your password has been sent to the e-mail address listed on your account.
Your purchase was successful, and you are now logged in.
A receipt was sent to your email.